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Reinvention Intensive Recap
January 19, 2025 /When you show up for your community they will how up for you. The first Reinvention Intensive Workshop of 2025 was held on January 4! The nerves I felt, because as Badu says, “I’m an artist and I’m sensitive about my shit.” The Reinvention Journal is on its 3rd iteration and I feel like it’s the best one yet. This is the one time that I have edited the journal after putting my story. It was too painful to read before. While I edited it this time I cried and still felt the same pain. Yet, I also felt relief in knowing this is just a chapter in my life. I get to help other women over 30 reinvent themselves using the same tools I did.
With that in mind I want to share the beautiful images taken by my photography sister Shenna Hair of SHair Photography. Thank you to Tiffanie Drayton of TCD Enterprises for the video testimonials. Thank you to my sponsor Le Blue Bodycare for samples of my favorite perfume, Nude. Big ass shout out to Jocelyn Thomas of Photogenicly Yours and Brittni Moore of Harmony and Flow Marketing for the floral arrangements, branded bags and journal.
The event was held at Spark Coworking in Downtown Baltimore. I made a grazing table too! We have to upcoming Reinvention Intensives: Virtual and in person.
On the 4th we had a time! We got to share, laugh and embrace the unknown. We got to hold space for each other and give advice. We got to eat at a communal table like a family. Some even sharing what they brought with the group. This was an experience I plan to replicate as many times as possible. The love, the sharing and the healing.
With that in mind I want to share the beautiful images taken by my photography sister Shenna Hair of SHair Photography. Thank you to Tiffanie Drayton of TCD Enterprises for the video testimonials. Thank you to my sponsor Le Blue Bodycare for samples of my favorite perfume, Nude. Big ass shout out to Jocelyn Thomas of Photogenicly Yours and Brittni Moore of Harmony and Flow Marketing for the floral arrangements, branded bags and journal.
The event was held at Spark Coworking in Downtown Baltimore. I made a grazing table too!
We have to upcoming Reinvention Intensives: Virtual and in person Downtown Baltimore
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#1 Reasons Your Boundaries Don’t Work
December 12, 2024 /Boundaries are the love letters we give to ourselves. They help us navigate a world that can be harsh and terrifying. I state often that Black women do not have a challenge with creating boundaries we have a challenge when implementing boundaries. We stretch ourselves to make our selves palatable and others comfortable at work, home and even in our houses of worship. We don’t want to be seen as too angry, too aggressive, too emotional or too needy.
We define acceptable treatment for us through boundaries. They help us by protecting our energy, time, and emotional well being. When struggling with boundaries you grapple with believing you are worthy of being treated with kindness, fairness, love and respect. You weigh your own self and find you lacking. The number one reason your boundaries don’t work is because you don’t feel you have the right or permission to have them.
That might be a hard pillow to swallow, but it’s okay. We are giving ourselves grace. As the newly minted Ancestor Nikki Giovanni said ” Show me someone not full of herself, and I’ll show you a hungry person.” You have to be so full of yourself that you automatically protect your energy, time and emotional well being.
How to start setting a boundary:
Tap into your body sis. When you are in certain places or with certain people how does your family feel? Are your shoulder tense or do you clench your jaw. I once had a friend that would give me headaches. Whenever I was around them for extended periods of time I would always have a headache. My body knew something, that I did not want to recognize.
Keep a journal. Journaling is a beautiful way to identify patterns within your life. We are busy and sometimes we forget things. Every evening do your best to write out what happened in your day. At the end of the week check to see if any patterns occur. You can use those patterns to identify where you need to implement a boundary.
Practice saying no. I know this may seem odd, but it is true. Practicing saying no without explaining yourself. You know how you feel or what you have the capacity to handle. Practicing can make it easy to say no without the guilt you might feel. We practice to improve, not to be perfect.
If you are finding it hard to start this journey know you are not alone. From a young age we are taught that boundaries do not exist for people we care about or for some authority figures in our lives. We have to deconstruct a lot of harmful rhetoric and it states time, commitment to self, knowledge, and a a community. I am hosting the first Ohexperience ® Reinvention Intensive for 2025 in Downtown Baltimore on January 4. If what you just read resonated with you join us, If you are not in Baltimore, but still interested please think about joining our private community with the same link.
Although many don’t write love letters anymore you still can. You can write a love letter to yourself every time you implement your boundaries. You are never too much of anything to the people that love and care about you. You deserve kindness, consideration, love and respect simply because you exist.
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Why my studio closed in 2023
July 31, 2023 /On July 9, 2023, I closed the doors of my Maryland studio. I did this for a variety of reasons. The primary reason is I want to help guide more Black womxn in centering themselves, loving their bodies as they are now, and recognizing pleasure is our birthright. When I am not capturing Black womxn in my studio I have been educating boudoir photographers on capturing us and leading workshops on reinvention and boundaries in tropical locations around the world.
I quit my job almost 2 years ago and the journey has been incredible, frustrating, expensive, and liberating. I have been able to do things I would not have dreamed of doing. Things I would not have been able to do if, I didn’t just say let me enjoy life. Let me do what I really want and if it doesn’t work out it’s okay. At least I got to say I did it and have no regrets.
I want to be a woman that reinvents herself often (I am on my 5th reinvention thus far). Not because I have to but because this new version of me requires something different. My needs are different and I deserve to exist in a space where all my needs are met.
My motto is you are your longest and most expensive relationship. No one should treat you betta than you treat yourself. You should love yourself to distraction and the people in your life should treat you with honor and respect. Especially in this world where you are always weighed against others and found lacking.
Closing my boudoir studio is an act of liberation and radical self-care. I will be traveling from August – November to Africa, Spain, and South East Asia, January is Kentucky and February is back to South East Asia. This will allow me time to learn more about myself, my next steps, and how I can fully embody being the favorite version of myself! I have no idea what will await me in these locations but I trust myself enough to know that this feels good and I am always right where I need to be. Plus my daddy aint raise no full, cause sis is street and book smart.
If you want to start your reinvention start here and use discount code AUG38 for $10 off.
If you are ready to join us in Cartagena for some real work, find out more information here.
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