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Olesha Haskett of Ohexperience Boudoir Photography: 5 Things You Need To Heal After a Dramatic Loss Or Life Change
5 Things You Need To Heal After a Dramatic Loss Or Life Change is about sharing your most painful moments in life for others to thrive and not just survive. Sharing your pain is never easy. It doesn’t matter if it happened 10 minutes or 20 years ago. The beauty in sharing your healing story is someone can see your growth and know it is possible for them too. I was asked to be a part of a series on healing from a dramatic loss by sharing 5 things I needed to heal. If you do not know my full story I talk briefly about my losses in the article. This is my truth and I am sharing it with the world.
Click here to read the article. If you are interested in starting your healing and self-love journey get a copy here. Healing yourself is not linear, it is cyclical. My favorite part of the article is here:
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
My favorite Life Lesson Quote is you are your longest and most expensive relationship. Investing in yourself is never time or money wasted. This quote has been relevant in my life because there was a time when I just let myself go. I was stuck, depressed, and felt like I was failing at life. I was nourishing a failing relationship and doing nothing for the relationship I had with myself. Putting another person’s needs before my own and seriously struggling with my mental, financial and spiritual health.
I hope you enjoy and start your journey to healing today. Not because you deserve it, but because you exist. The video is an added bonus with my top 5 tips! Let me know in the comments which one is your favorite.
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Radical Self Care as a Black woman
Radical Self Care as a Black woman. You know how you never realize you need something until you actually experience it? Like you never realize how heavy the shit is you are carrying until someone else brings it up. I decided to take this vacation because little by little I was slowly falling apart. My body, my spirit, and my mind were all in flux. I had so many ideas running through my head and felt like I couldn’t decide on anything. So many projects happening at one time and I decided to just lay my burdens down because it was getting too heavy.
The relief I felt was like, when you gotta pee and you finally make it to the commode. That intense relief that almost feels like an orgasm (or maybe it’s just me 🤷🏾♀️). I felt that as soon as I made it to my room. That relief intensified the next morning as I sat on the balcony and just breathed. My shoulders relaxed and I felt peace. No dms, no notifications, and no emails. Peace like I haven’t felt in since I was in Mexico in August .
That peace allowed me to focus on myself,my vision, and my wins. I was able to block out all distractions and just be. Nothing else mattered but my wants, needs, and desires. It was transformative and very much needed. I have been told many times that I do not celebrate my wins. Like a machine, I keep moving to the next thing. No more.
Almost 6 years ago I reinvented myself and I have not looked back. I authored a workbook journal telling my story to empower others and the reviews make me shed a tear every time. I have created virtual workshops for Black women and femmes to see themselves as the standard of beauty and celebrate their sensuality. I have created spaces for other amazing talented Black boudoir photographers to showcase their work. I am surrounded by other womxn that want to see me succeed beyond my wildest dreams.
I am extremely grateful for what I have and for what I am creating for the future. If you want to take this healing, loving, and affirming journey with me make sure you sign up for the newsletter and get a copy of The Reinvention Workbook Journal. Remember self-care is not selfish, it is selfless. Radical Self Care as a Black woman.
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Tanyisha’s Glam Experience
Some womxn can be hesitant or do not want to do a boudoir experience, but still want to tap into their sensuality and freedom. Which is perfectly okay sensuality is all about having the confidence to step into your power as a womxn. Tanyisha one half of the amazing sister duo, Class & Style Productions, gave me the honor helping her step into her sensuality.
“I was feeling kind of in a slump so that day and seeing the final product truly helped picked up my spirits and gave me confidence again.”
I did cry thug tears. Check out this almost 40 hot mama in action!
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Finding Freedom in Your Own Body
A few weeks ago I joined Clubhouse after swearing I wasn’t going to do it because I am team Android. Many of the business womxn I know told me it was made for me and my message. I got on and whoa! It was like the damn Wild West on this Clubhouse streets. I was not impressed and was really ready to chuck the duces and keep it moving. After more exploration and really cultivating my interest, I think I kinda got the hang of it now.
A few days into my journey I ran across a room for photographers and decided to join because the title of the room was Purpose and Positivity in Photography. I listened for a while and then decided to get bold and raise my hand to go on stage. I did this because representation matters. As I recall there was only one person of color on the stage. I got on stage talked my shit, answered a question or two, and left.
I received so many messages and follows after this. Amazing messages thanking me for getting on stage and how much it meant to see me there. I was even invited to be apart of a podcast! There will be times when you are uncertain about what you are going to say, but you know you need to speak up. Always speak up, because you never know who is listening and who you inspire.
LISTEN TO THE PODCAST EPISODE HERE:
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A year in review
Whew child! 2020 has been a year where I have stepped fully into damn myself. No longer worried about what others think of me and how I express myself. It has been a year for telling my story on my own terms. Embracing my spirituality and growing into my relationship with my Ancestors. Realizing that I have to be honest with myself, even when it hurts. Healing is a journey, even when you think you are finished, there is always more.
This year has also been the year for asking for help and building community. Being dependent on others and allowing people in has been a struggle. Not just a struggle, but a strug-gleee! Past trauma does that to us if we are not careful. Our past will show up in the present as self-sabotaging behavior or imposter syndrome and we don’t even realize it. I am grateful to my Ancestors and the Creator that amazing sister-friends are in my life who give it to me straight, no chaser! The end of 2020 has been emotional, but very much needed. A purge of my past to bring forth the love, sisterhood, and abundance I deserve.
Now that, that is out of the way, this has been a year of self-portraits for me. Honestly, it has helped me be a better boudoir photographer when I practice posing. It has also helped me get in touch with my inner goddess, sensuality, and sexuality. Check out my Tulum selfies here. My phone has been my self-portrait camera, but I decided to take it up a notch and use my baby with it’s self-timer. I plan to make this a monthly personal project and at the end of 2021 see my progression. Enjoy and Happy New Year!
